Grr

There is nothing that pisses me off more than parents of typical children who are shit. Shit at managing their child's behaviour. Shit at teaching their child manners. Shit at personal hygiene. I could go on.
Basically, we have an issue at Tom's school with another kid who has a less than ideal situation at home (chain-smoking, hacking, no dad in picture, etc etc). I don't blame the kid. It's not their fault.
I do take issue with a grandma that accosts me at preschool and tells me that if she had her way, she'd just tell A to hit him back. Him being Tom. I pointed out to her that it was my understanding that it wasn't Tom starting it most of the time, at which she begrudging accepted appeared to be the case from what the staff had told her.
Don't get me wrong, all 4 yr olds squabble, push, chase, grab hold of coats, in fact that's what I witnessed between 4 boys in the playground, including Tom, as I picked him up today. A certain amount of boy behaviour, I think, is normal. But, when I have the grandma tell me 'he tries to wrestle with me', um, hello? YOU'RE THE ADULT.
Tell the kid no. Don't allow that kind of play and don't allow them to watch that kind of thing either, as I told her. I'm sorry, but, whilst I know that it's not the kid's fault and Tom's not an angel, I don't like that we're paying (or at least our insurance is) $36,000 per year for behavioural therapy and I will be damned if I allow it to be derailed by a kid who has useless parents. We had a hitting issue last year when Tom was 3 and couldn't communicate well enough to meet his needs quickly enough for him. That was resolved within a couple of weeks and he's been massively better since, for the most part. I can't believe we're having it again this year.
I guess we'll give it a few weeks after Christmas (with hopefully some modelling and help from the autism specialist at preschool) and go from there...
Yes, I'm judging. Yes, I'm being mean. I don't care. 

In other happenings today, I went to visit TCA and liked the school. The kinder class I saw was so orderly and quiet, it was awesome. I hope Tom will be able to cope there. I also talked with the sped director and she said that she didn't hear anything about Tom that was raising red flags for her or their ability to accommodate him. Also, I liked the fact that she said the only real way to see if a school is a good fit, is to see how the kid gets on and does after the first few months. I kind of agree. We'll never know how good a setting will be for him without trying. So, we'll see, but it's promising.